Search This Blog

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Doorways to Drama...

Staying friends with your exes.

I’m debating whether or not this is a good idea.

I am still friends with 96% of my exes; there are always a few assholes that I wish would fall into a quicksand/fire ant colony…
But, aside from them, I genuinely like all the guys I’ve dated, or I wouldn’t have dated them in the first place.

I don’t have a habit of creating drama or burning bridges.  So maintaining relationships is easy.

We stay friends in the sense that we can talk to each other about relationships, do each other favors like moving furniture, giving rides to the airport, etc…

Oh, and I NEVER sleep with my exes, that’s just confusing and weird.  I have enough issues; I don’t need that kind of complication.

I have this one ex, M, he and I dated for a minute (appx one year).  I’ve mentioned him previously.  We have been broken up almost 2 years now.  We had a lot of fun together, but there was never any real passion.  So we broke it off, and remained close friends.  We were really like brother and sister.
He loved my family and they embraced him.  He and his boys loved going down to the farm.
So we continued to include them in family functions.  M loved family, but really didn’t have much family of his own.  Even though I bitch about mine, I think family is very important.
M has even hung out with my Dad without me around, so I’m clearly not the draw.

Ok, so, M has a girlfriend, or fiancé I should say.  They seem happy.  He’s discussed a few issues with me, and I’ve tried to be encouraging.  We don’t talk nearly as much as we used to, which is cool.
So, I go to Facebook yesterday to ask him a car question (he’s a mechanic) and he’s not there.  Not in my friends list and I can’t search and find him.

M’s sister-in-law have remained friendly, so I messaged her and asked if M had deleted his Facebook account.

“No” she replied.

Well I’ll be damned.  He deleted me AND blocked me. 

I’m offended and my feelings are a little hurt.  Had I been posting things on his wall or making dumb ass comments, I could understand.  But I haven’t.

I even commented to him once, after he asked me to go biking “Is T ok with that?”  and he said “She has to understand that I come with a Beth”.

I wouldn’t understand it, but the decisions he makes are HIS.

Well, M’s SIL is pissed about it, she doesn’t like the fiancé.  So she texted him and asked him.  He denied doing it.

I’m over this. 

Do not expect to be invited to any more family events, M.  Oh, and I did invite the fiancé to the last one too, so she could see that there isn’t any weirdness, she didn’t come.  I’m not sure I blame her, really. 
“I’m going to spend the holiday with my ex and her family” yea I get that is a little odd.  But in our defense, my family is awesome.

So, I shrug my shoulders, think that I need to find a new mechanic and go to bed.

This morning I awake to a rambling email from the fiancé.

Just fucking terrific.

It wasn’t an, “Hi, I’d love to get to know you” email.

It was an “I think you’re inappropriate, I didn’t block you on M’s Facebook, I don’t want to get to know you” etc, etc…

It was a long email and I really can’t sum it up here, but I have to say that I feel attacked.  I haven’t replied, I don’t even know if I will, I sorta feel the need to defend myself, she’s got a few things really wrong, but who am I to shatter her delusions?  I am NO THREAT to their relationship, but her attack makes me think that she feels I am.  I, honestly, don’t want her to feel like that.  I wouldn’t want anyone to feel like that.  M had a history of infidelity, so I’m sure that is always in the back of her mind, she even mentioned it in the email.

I may be bitchy sometimes, but I truly don’t want to be the instrument of ANYONE’s pain.  Unless, of course, it’s some jerkface that’s hurt someone I love, then it’s on like Donkey Kong.

The only thing the mean part of me wants to reply is “You know those sheets on his bed? They’re mine.”  But, in reality, I’d never do that. 

Ok, enough about that shit.

Last night I started putting together a photo collage.  Mausoleum doors and gates.  “Doorways of Death”, I’ve dubbed it.
I got them all framed last night, now to decide where and how I’m going to hang them.

And I bought myself some flowers last night.  I love fresh flowers and since I don’t have anyone to give them to me, I’ll give them to myself!!!


Vigilarius said...

Remaining friends with exes? Not a good idea, in my opinion. (If you knew my exes, you'd know why I feel this way!) ;)

TrippyBeth said...

Most of my exes are really good guys, just not the guys for me. this entire turn of events has really got me rethinking alot of things...
all i know is this, he can kiss going to the farm goodbye, and my ass while he's at it.
he has burned this bridge that's fo sho...