tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-60624012356270011462024-02-20T19:11:33.473-05:00Reflections Upon My SkinTrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.comBlogger190125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-53245400969004714572014-03-11T12:04:00.001-04:002014-03-11T12:04:34.387-04:00HatersWell it appears that I have a hater... The second one actually.<div>This particular hater has gone to the trouble of tracking me down across the interwebs to try and hurt my feelings.</div><div>But, he cannot spell and has poor grammar. So, I think I should feel sorry for him, he's obviously crying out for attention.</div><div>He (I assume) has said some ugly things, which you can see in the comments of my precious post; his words are so vehement that I wonder if we know each other personally.</div><div>He posts anonymously, so I have no idea who he is, but he sure has his panties in a was.</div><div>They say bad publicity is better than no publicity...</div>TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-62847211888704501232013-12-30T15:37:00.000-05:002013-12-30T15:37:31.888-05:00Did You Miss Me?
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I haven’t been here in a while… I haven’t really felt
inspired to bore anyone with the details of my life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The details haven’t been worthy of writing
about anyway.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I survived Christmas.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I guess that’s a victory.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t
say that I wanted to, survive that is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve
made a few promises to friends that if I ever feel suicidal I’ll talk to them.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Was I sincere when I made the promise? No.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I just wanted to make them feel better and promising was the
easy way to move on.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
That being said, I’m kinda big on promises.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I try my damnedest not to break them.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Lying in my bed on Christmas Eve, I flirted with my
contingency plan, but thoughts of the promises kept surfacing, making their way
up through the ocean of vodka I was trying to drown my feelings in.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
First of all, would I call any of my friends on Christmas Eve
(when they are happily celebrating with their friends and family) and tell them
that I’m feeling suicidal?</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Uuuuummmm fuck no.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
not a complete fuckweasel.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
And offing yourself at Christmas is just too pathetic and cliché.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
So I just got drunk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I know, my coping powers are pretty goddamn amazing.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I also got a tattoo and my hair isn’t red anymore… my mental
condition can be measured by my tattoos and hair color changes… like some weird
dysfunctional barometer.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s ok though,
I love the new tattoo and the hair doesn’t look awful.</div>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I, honestly, think that I can thank (or blame) the camera
for helping me survive 2013.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Last week someone asked why I choose the subjects that I do
for my photography (abandonments, specifically)… I can relate to them… they’re
rejected, unloved, forgotten, ignored, not as pretty as they used to be, no
longer useful, haunted… just like me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe,
together, the camera and I can save a little bit of these places, for posterity…
and maybe, save me in the process??</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I was asked “Why did you change your hair?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My answer “I wanted to be someone different,
maybe, eventually I’ll be someone that I like.”</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
It just occurred to me, that this time last year, I was in <st1:country-region><st1:place>Georgia</st1:place></st1:country-region>…
seems like a lifetime ago…</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
And New Year’s Eve… fuck… I find it hard to get excited
about a new year… I really wish that I could though.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s not like a have a dance card full of
party invitations anyway… maybe I’ve been spending too much time in my hermit
hole.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
People say “You’ve got so many things to be happy about” and
they’ll go so far as to enumerate them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Perhaps in an attempt to guilt me out of depression… I mean, that’s a
proven effective method, right?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, I’m
almost glad that people don’t understand… it means they haven’t lived it.</div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-61531290042153167502013-10-17T04:05:00.001-04:002013-10-17T04:05:59.170-04:00Feelings Can Bite MeI'm missing the days that I did who and what I wanted... Not getting attached, having fun, not having regrets and just living.<div>Now... I put my heart back out on my sleeve and it got poked. Not poked in a good way. </div><div>Since my heart has been out wandering around, it's grown... Maybe to a normal size heart. And now... It won't fit back in it's box.</div><div>That's fucking awesome.</div><div>It's just going to be out there on the loose getting poked, prodded, kicked, stepped on and gum stuck to its little heart shoes. </div><div>I have a good heart, I know that, that's why I've guarded it so closely... I suppose it's the rest of me that's not worthy. </div><div>How does one get their brain and their heart on the same plane? </div>TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-55410479924167227782013-10-13T18:12:00.001-04:002013-10-13T18:12:06.615-04:00Dead Inside<br><div>Well I've discovered that I am, in fact, dead inside, emotionally.<div>This was the icing on the cake, after turning down a self professed "hot" attorney....</div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieSoXrq69W2PeWYmYt2R32PJbt6aGtWJ5cvoIe3ImKnJYzzqfO_DtXTnpLUKzr0QFN5lj7QYIeVKyjrfkJs3Rji2pj0ARvfb0j0FAsc67yvpBmyfMWrmTj45GDsYRYwVAFd_zIQORlS2gY/s640/blogger-image-1269827199.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieSoXrq69W2PeWYmYt2R32PJbt6aGtWJ5cvoIe3ImKnJYzzqfO_DtXTnpLUKzr0QFN5lj7QYIeVKyjrfkJs3Rji2pj0ARvfb0j0FAsc67yvpBmyfMWrmTj45GDsYRYwVAFd_zIQORlS2gY/s640/blogger-image-1269827199.jpg"></a></div><br></div></div>TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-69842141845539231532013-10-02T15:17:00.000-04:002013-10-02T15:17:48.308-04:00Things Are Getting BetterThe fog is finally beginning to lift.<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I’ve had a few friends talk to me; help me not internalize this
situation quite so much.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I just don’t understand why I want someone that doesn’t want
me? That’s just crazy, I cause myself more pain than is necessary… I feel like
a masochist sometimes. </div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
But in my last communication with him, he said something
that really hurt me… maybe I didn’t know him as well as I thought, he obviously
didn’t care about me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe I was just
trying to make the relationship in to what I wanted it to be, but something
that it could never be.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I do KNOW this; he liked it when he was with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Did that scare him?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Was I fun but just not loveable? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Perhaps I will never know and I just have to accept that. </div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I was as good as I knew how to be, I did nothing to hurt him,
just like I promised that I wouldn’t, and he was the one who hurt me… if that
wasn’t good enough, there’s not much I can do about it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I was me, and I’m not for everyone.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Does it still sting?? Fuck yes it does.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Do I still feel shitty about myself?? Fuck yes I do.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Do I wonder if I’ll ever be good enough? Every moment of
every day.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
But a friend said this to me “You are sexy, it is your
superpower, use it for good.”</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I can’t say that I concur, but it felt good to hear it, from
someone that didn’t have to say anything.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I’ve been asked out a few times, I haven’t accepted yet… but
I am taking a road trip to <st1:place>Jersey</st1:place> with a friend next
week… kind of an up and back thing, but it will be good just to get away… and I
love a road trip <span style="font-family: Wingdings; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;"><span style="mso-char-type: symbol; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;">J</span></span>.</div>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both;">
Half a smile is better than none, right???</div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-50591281770598315242013-09-29T22:28:00.001-04:002013-09-29T22:28:46.247-04:00Welcoming the DarknessFeeling rejected, sad, lonely, unworthy, unloveable, undesirable, ugly, stupid... <div><br></div><div>You see something you don't want to see and you can't un-see it. </div><div><br></div><div>Letting the darkness swallow me back up... Not even going to fight it. </div>TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-85947319841731192862013-09-25T10:06:00.003-04:002013-09-25T12:46:19.645-04:00Pity PhotographyHere is what I do when I'm alone and feeling sorry for myself... well one of the things that I do, the least destructive thing...<br />
<br />
<a href="http://reflectionsuponmyreality2.wordpress.com/">http://reflectionsuponmyreality2.wordpress.com/</a><br />
<br />
Conversation at work with work friend:<br />
<br />
Me: "Did you have fun on your day off?"<br />
<br />
Friend: "You mean at my grandma's funeral?"<br />
<br />
Yep, I'm that girl.TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-43869674115166918242013-09-24T15:56:00.000-04:002013-09-24T15:56:09.449-04:00Wandering Through the Black FogI participated in a wedding Friday evening… the only people
present were; the couple, my friend Boom who was the minister and myself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>According to the couple, NO ONE knew they
were getting married.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Interesting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wondered whose parents were not okay with
it.<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
And, they totally poo-pooed getting wedding presents.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The ONLY reason I’d marry again would be for
wedding presents… I REALLY need some new towels.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I acted as both the photographer and the witness at the
wedding, and the minister-in-training.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
After the wedding, I went home, went to bed and stayed there
for >36hrs.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I told everyone that it was my allergies… but it wasn’t.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Sometimes the black fog swallows me whole, dragging me into
a pit so deep that I wonder if this will be the time that I’m not able to pull
myself out.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
That sounds really dramatic, doesn’t it?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I can really think of no other words to
describe it… and I own a super thesaurus.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I pulled my ass out of bed on Sunday morning because we were
going zip lining for my Dad’s birthday and I had to make the long trek back
home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I took the camera and made a few
stops on the way, which did make me feel a little better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Here’s an example of what I captured (<a href="http://reflectionsuponmyreality2.wordpress.com/2013/09/23/the-porny-house/"><span style="color: blue;">http://reflectionsuponmyreality2.wordpress.com/2013/09/23/the-porny-house/</span></a>).</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I did have a friend, a reader of this blog, tell me that I’m
too hard on myself “you have so much to offer – guy needs his head examined.”</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I want to believe that sooooooo badly, that it’s not me,
that I’m wanted, desirable, needed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yet,
the loneliness overshadows the possibility of those beliefs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am the common denominator here… only me.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I know, I hear the tiny violins playing too…<o:p></o:p></div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-51811681293957587782013-09-16T11:13:00.002-04:002013-09-16T11:13:55.971-04:00She Doth Fuck it Up
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I think, that when I focus on trying really hard to do
things right, I end up fucking it up.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
This is apparently what I’ve done.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I’m sad about it, my heart hurts…</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
My adorable introvert is done with me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
What it interesting about that, is that I didn’t do anything
wrong.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I tried really hard to give him
the space that he needed, but I also feel like I let him know that I really
care about him, I disabled my dating profiles, I turned down invitations to go
out, I told everyone that I was “seeing someone”, I didn’t run when the
scheduling thing with us was hard (and if you know me, it is my nature to run
when a relationship hits a speed bump, but I didn’t)…</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Yet… I haven’t heard a word for 4 days.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I tried to explain what he misunderstood… maybe I over-explained
it “she doth protest too much”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He’s a
wicked smart guy, I thought he’d realize that it wasn’t what he thought… I guess
I’m wrong, again.</div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Maybe dating just isn’t for me… I need a long break from it
all I guess…</div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-440990018884718242013-08-26T13:10:00.001-04:002013-08-26T13:10:49.360-04:00Introverted Extroversion...
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I’ve taken multiple personality tests over the last few
years, in an attempt to understand myself and possibly what I need.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I’ve gotten a variety of results that basically say that I’m
different variations of an extrovert (and obviously a little schizo).</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
According to Myers-Briggs, I’m an ENFP, which I’ve
previously mentioned, which basically says that I’m an extrovert that relies
mostly on intuition, feelings and perception.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I think that’s, mostly, an accurate assessment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, I don’t think that I’m always an
extrovert.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Maybe it’s because I’m an only child and I learned to live
with my own company, enjoy solitude, entertain myself, etc…</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Sometimes I like being out with a crowd, I have a pretty
large circle of friends and acquaintances, however, I am not a
go-out-every-night kind of girl.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But,
when I’m out, I’m OUT and I have a good time.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Sometimes I enjoy the peacefulness of being alone, it can be
recharging.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This weekend, other than a
wedding I attended, I barely spoke to another soul, aside from the cats (please
don’t draw any conclusions from that).</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Okay, now to what I wanted to discuss…</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I am dating an introvert.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>And I like dating him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes I
feel a little frustrated at the limited time that we have to spend together,
because we work opposite shifts and probably because my limited extrovertedness
is probably exhausting to him.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I am learning to slow my roll.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It isn’t easy for me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I like to show people that I care about them;
I like to make things better when I can… and this isn’t what he needs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
When he was sick, it was my immediate instinct to make soup
and take him things to make him feel better.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>This was not what he wanted; this wasn’t how he deals with being ill… he
prefers to do it alone.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
For a little bit it stung… I was being pushed away, I wasn’t
wanted… which can, in my mind, translate to “you’re not good enough”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Which I realize is MY issue, not his and I can’t
project it on him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I may have had a
moment of passive aggression, which I quickly recognized (he did too).</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
So… I’ve read several articles on “dating an introvert” and
they make a lot of sense.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Basically, it’s
just recognizing his needs, which are different from mine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So we both will need to be patient with other.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
I think he could be worth the patience… I mean I haven’t run
yet… which is completely out of character for me.</div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-6520447863706959962013-08-19T15:58:00.000-04:002013-08-19T15:58:47.268-04:00No Fucking Idea...This morning, as I was slaving away at the office, I noticed something.<br />
I had only taken the nail polish off of the nails of my right hand... my left hand was still painted.<br />
<br />
The first question I was asked upon this discovery was "Were you drinking?"<br />
<br />
I actually had to think about it.<br />
<br />
I had a few Doozers (thanks BT) Sunday night, but I think the nail polish removing occurred on Saturday, so NO I wasn't drinking. I apparently just have no idea what the fuck I'm doing.<br />
<br />
A Doozer is blackberry schnapps, sprite and a splash of cherry liqueur. They're pretty tasty if I do say so myself.TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-45128402459033266652013-08-14T13:23:00.002-04:002013-08-14T13:23:40.133-04:00Some Days Suck...
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Having a chronic illness sucks, in sooooo many ways.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
First, which I don’t even have to mention, is the fact that
you have a chronic illness… it’s totally unfair and sucks royally (not in a
good way).</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Second, doctor visits.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My doctor visit frequency has decreased since my diagnosis and since I refuse
to go unless I’m afraid that I could possibly be dying a painful death.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I thought I was dying lost in some
beautiful reverie, it is unlikely that I’d pursue any medical care.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Third, medication.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I take
what seems, to me, a lot of medication.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A
chemo medication, steroids, anti-inflammatories, anti-chemo side effect
medication, stomach medication, vitamins, and some holistic stuff. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s a pain to take all of this to stave off
effects of my particular disorder because some of it has to be timed and you
have to plan if you’re going places, it’s also expensive.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Money I’d much rather spend at the thrift
store or on booze…</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Fourth, “you don’t look sick”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don’t want people to think of me as “sick”
really, but I also want people to understand that if I have to bow out of
something, it’s not because I’m lazy.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Fifth, I’m fucking tired.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Not ALL of the time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I try so
hard to be the same girl that I was before I got sick.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But who am I kidding? I am so much less
active now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I still push myself to do
the things that I like to do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I get out
with the camera as often as I can and I would love to do more urbex (even
though after I did my last solo urbex adventure I was sick with a fever for 2
days).</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Today, I feel like I’ve been exsaunguinated.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
And if I over-do-it I’ll get sick with some crappy virus or
something that I can’t even quantify.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Sixth, pain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m
tired of the random pain.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While it’s not
debilitating, it’s exhausting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve been
dealing with a slipped-rib fuckweasel malady for about a week… I’m so over it.</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p> </o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Today, I’d just really like for someone to wrap me in their
arms and tell me that everything will be okay…</div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-12467426463358170832013-08-12T10:55:00.004-04:002013-08-12T10:55:48.741-04:00Hark the Herald... whatever...Harkening back on last week...<br />
<br />
It's surprising to me how the words "I want to see you again before Saturday" made me smile.<br />
<br />
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-46066610066285712552013-08-06T15:21:00.001-04:002013-08-06T15:21:48.220-04:00Sometimes I wonder...About myself.<br />
<br />
I blew off happy hour with KR tonight, partially because I am still fighting some rather unpleasant allergies and partially because I want to go home and drink wine... alone.<br />
<br />
I love KR dearly and this has nothing to do with her, it is strictly me.<br />
<br />
While drinking alone may not be healthy in everyone's eyes, sometimes it is what I need to do to right myself. It usually works like control-alt-delete...<br />
<br />
We shall see...<br />
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TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-23849312611985397012013-08-06T11:42:00.000-04:002013-08-06T11:42:08.255-04:00My Happy Birthday!!!Well I have to report that I had another fantastic birthday week... <br />
The week culminated in a small gathering Saturday night on Mainstrasse. The weather was perfect for sitting outside and imbibing... and of course people watching... and laughing, there was lots of laughing!<br />
I have to admit to one fairly critical mistake that I made Saturday night... I didn't stick to just one alcohol.<br />
When will I learn?? Once I start drinking, EVERYTHING sounds like a great idea.<br />
We started the evening with a little absinthe... which totally had me buzzing before it even hit my stomach.<br />
Then there was bourbon and coke at the bar, some Horny Goat, then some Pink Ladies... the Pink Ladies did it... pushed me totally over the edge...<br />
Even with the brutal hangover that I had Sunday, my birthday was AWESOME!<br />
I really liked having BT out with me (flutters eyelashes).<br />
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</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both;">
Anyway... for your viewing (dis)pleasure... teenage TrippyBeth.... It's hard to tell, but that is an elephant on my velour sweater... UG</div>
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TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-32025425047774659742013-08-01T12:06:00.001-04:002013-08-01T12:06:38.846-04:00Touch Me NOT<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">I have to take
this opportunity to tell you all what a fantastic birthday week I’m having!!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">Saturday and Monday
were dinners with my family, and then Tuesday BT took me out to dinner.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: Wingdings; mso-ascii-font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;"><span style="mso-char-type: symbol; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;">J</span></span><span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">Yes, I’m totally
dorking out… but it feels good and I don’t apologize!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">Tonight my girls
and I are going out for sushi and sake! YAY!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I have the best girlfriends in the entire world… I’m sorry for you if
you are not in our circle of trust, but I’m sure your friends are just fine.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">Tomorrow night, I
am laying low, in anticipation for Birthday Shenanigans on Saturday night! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">Yes, I LOVE
birthdays!! That being said, I’ve had some really shitty ones in the past.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’ve had really shitty holidays of every
kind, honestly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">In the past 4
years, I’ve had some lonely holidays, some drunken holidays and some nice ones…
I may not like Christmas, still, but it doesn’t inspire the feelings of dread
that it used to.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">Saturday night
will be a blending of my worlds… BT will be meeting some family and some of my
friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They are all awesome, and he is
awesome, so it should be just fine… I’m, surprisingly, not nervous about
it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hope he isn’t.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";"><o:p> </o:p></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">Tuesday night,
after our delicious dinner at Don Pablo’s, we stopped by the Village Pub for a
couple of beers. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We chose the Horny Goat
brews, which were quite tasty!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";"><o:p> </o:p></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">There was a guy
sitting one barstool away from me, who I hadn’t noticed, until he felt the
impulse to touch my arm whilst commenting about my dragonfly tattoo.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then, he proceeded to lift the back of his
own shirt to show me his tattoo on his shoulder and give me a brief lesson in
his family history.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";"><o:p> </o:p></span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">I’ve lamented
here before, the fact that people think that it’s perfectly acceptable to touch
me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Most of those complaints were about
people that I actually KNOW touching me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I have a big problem with that, but being touched by a stranger does not
play into my wheelhouse, AT ALL!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">I mean what the
fuck?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">Having a visible
tattoo is not an invitation to fondle me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I continue to be stunned by the people who think that it is acceptable. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Were they raised by wolves?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">Anyway, BT said “I
think he likes some Trippybeth.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC";">I’m not sure
that was the case at all… I just think the guy had a few drinks and, perhaps,
left his manners in the potty.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So, I blew
it off… I had much better things to focus on…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-91405734456200703662013-07-19T13:55:00.000-04:002013-07-19T13:55:42.388-04:00The Keys To My Success
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">Yesterday,
at work, I ask “Has anyone read anything good lately? I need a new book.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">The
first response I get is “When do I ever have time to read?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Shouted over the cubes by OMG girl.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">Really?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">This
was not the question that I was asking.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
simply wanted a suggestion for a good book.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">Why
do some people take any opportunity to regale us with the misery that is their
lives?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">Am
I annoyed because I simply do not give a fuck?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">That’s
not entirely true.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I do not take
pleasure in seeing people in misery.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well,
there are a few people that I would like to see with burning assholes for the
rest of eternity, but for the most part I’m pretty peace-loving.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">I
actually try to down play any misery that I might be suffering from to the
general public.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m beginning to believe
that I am the minority here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>From work
to Facebook, everywhere I look or listen, someone is COMPLAINING and usually quite
loudly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">Now,
if you’ve read here for any length of time, I’m sure that you’re thinking “TrippyBeth
complains a lot herself.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And you wouldn’t
be wrong.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">However,
I’m really trying to change my life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Negativity
breeds more negativity, it’s a vicious circle that I’m trying to stop.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">I
want to be happy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I ‘m thinking happy
thoughts, being grateful, visualizing the things that I want and I’m open to
receiving them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">This
was a little difficult yesterday after locking myself out of my apartment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, I had a cell phone to call for help, I had
a friend to come pick me up, I had another friend take me home and lots of
good-natured teasing… it most definitely could have been worse!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And it was something to laugh about all day.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">Who
doesn’t need more laughs?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Tempus Sans ITC"; font-size: 14pt;">I
was able to get back in my apartment last night and in three hours the weekend
begins… what’s not to like about that?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-88677533844022441322013-07-08T11:20:00.000-04:002013-07-08T11:20:59.575-04:00A Thistle by Another Name... Is Just as PricklyWell... My friends, my mood has improved.<br />
<div>
My friend B and I discussed things and have decided to continue with our friendship. </div>
<div>
I am pleased with myself that I didn't run for the hills, like I'd normally do. </div>
<div>
Maybe Trippybeth is growing up.</div>
<div>
(But, hey, who really wants that?)</div>
<div>
B and I had the most fantastic day on Friday. Honestly, it was one of the best days in my recent memories. I feel lucky.</div>
<div>
You can follow our shenanigans on my photo blog.<br />
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<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Saturday I finally got my thistle tattoo!!! </div>
<div>
My friend KR rode to Dayton with me and witnessed her first tattoo!! </div>
<div>
Kevin, as always did a fantastic job for me and I'm very pleased! </div>
<div>
The half sleeve is coming along nicely. </div>
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The stencil.</div>
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Kevin working hard...</div>
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The finished product!!</div>
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The after-ink sangria ;-)</div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-91776447787226506552013-07-01T15:53:00.000-04:002013-07-01T15:53:43.278-04:00Please Pass the Bourbon<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">At my last posting I confessed to being smitten.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>According to Webster’s, one of the definitions of smitten is “To be struck with a firm blow”.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I couldn’t have been more accurate with using a term than I was with using smitten.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Today, I was struck with a firm blow, unexpectedly, squarely in the gut.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I was dismissed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I can’t really say “dumped” since there was no relationship declaration.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I feel DUMPED.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Crying at work is sooooooo not cool.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I won’t detail his reasons here, out of respect for him, his reasons are his own and from what he said it wasn’t about me (unless that was just to spare my feelings).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I actually understand the reasons that he gave me; it’s someplace that I’ve been before.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Maybe my stupid enthusiasm had something to do with it… in fact, I’m sure that it did.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wear my heart on my sleeve sometimes, and when I think something or have an idea, I have to share it, that’s just how I roll…<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>maybe I need to change some more things about me???<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Do I think that he’s being rash? Do I think that he’s fucking up?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">HELL YES I DO.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">But, it’s not my decision… I can only live with it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I guess I’m upset that I let myself feel a connection with someone and have some hope that it could possibly turn into something.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s not my usual MO.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, I did feel a connection with him; I saw something very special in him that I haven’t seen in many before.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I’m not mad, but my feelings are hurt, I have that pain that a person gets deep inside their chest, maybe that’s where my soul is??<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Now what do I do this weekend?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I took a vacation day on Friday because we were gonna take a day trip. I was so looking forward to it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I guess I could go alone, but that doesn’t sound like too much fun to me…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I think I’ll just get drunk.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-5414660270355895232013-06-13T14:03:00.001-04:002013-06-13T14:03:39.936-04:00Accenting the Obvious<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">Admit it, you either like them or you hate them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">Most people begin to immediately make assumptions about a person as soon as they hear a voice that doesn’t sound like their own.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">Whether the assumptions carry any weight or not, that’s just how our minds seem to work.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">You know that when you hear a southern, a </span><st1:state><st1:place><span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">New York</span></st1:place></st1:state><span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">, a </span><st1:city><st1:place><span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">Boston</span></st1:place></st1:city><span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">, a British, an Indian accent you already think that you know something about the person.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A little slow perhaps? Snooty? Sophisticated? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">I’ll admit I’ve been a little swayed by a lovely accent before; I’ve dated Irish, British and Italian men.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But underneath the soliloquy, they’re just dudes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We all know that there are assholes in every nationality.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">These makes me think of a guy I once met on a dating site.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We started out texting, which is how I prefer things to go, then, late one night, he called me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">“Wow, you have an accent!”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Was his initial comment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">“Yea, I know, I’m not a </span><st1:city><st1:place><span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">Cincinnati</span></st1:place></st1:city><span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;"> native.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I reply, thinking it will be the end of the discussion about my accent.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Which, by the way, isn’t a bad accent at all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And the longer I live here, the slighter it becomes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">But… it went on and on…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">“From looking at you, I’d never guess you had a country accent!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">Sheesh…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">I may not look like a country girl, but, underneath all this ink… I am one.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">I’ve always thought that I sounded like a hick and even as my accent becomes slighter, there are words that I know I’ll never be able to say “right”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But that’s ok, that’s part of my charm.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">Anyway, he kept going on and on about my accent, even trying to mimic it (or mock, I’m not sure).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I began to feel a little offended.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have a chip on my shoulder, and I can accept some good natured teasing, but for fuck’s sake, he wouldn’t let it go.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">I was sooooooo relieved when he got another call that he had to take.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">Now, he could have been a perfectly nice guy who was a little nervous, not a good conversationalist or just a total dunce, I don’t know.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">I have to put him in the same category as the guy who said I looked like a really cute cartoon character.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">Oh yea, before I forget to mention it, TrippyBeth is smitten.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">I know, look out and batten down the hatches!!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Footlight MT Light'; font-size: 14pt;">I don’t know if it will go anywhere, not sure if he’s smitten or not, all I know, right now, is that I like spending time with him…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Oh, don't forget to check out my photo blog if you get the chance!!</div>
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<a href="http://reflectionsuponmyreality2.wordpress.com/">http://reflectionsuponmyreality2.wordpress.com/</a></div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-68752100133109105872013-04-15T13:24:00.000-04:002013-04-15T13:24:01.417-04:00Bourbon and Porn<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I can’t believe that it’s been over a month since I’ve posted here!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I had 2 people tell me over the weekend that they’ve missed me… it’s good to be missed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Nothing too exciting has been going on… maybe one thing, which I’m keeping to myself for the time being.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I, of course, still get interesting messages on the dating site.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The most interesting, recent one said this:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">“I really like your profile, and by the way, I make amateur porn.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Folks, we have a winner!!!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Before I hit delete, you know me, I had to reply.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All that I said was this:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">“So is everyone that owns an iPhone.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Just ask Siri, she will tell you that good amateur porn is all about angles…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Recently I’ve been obsessed, only, with photography which you can see here.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">And getting out and having a little bourbon now and then… G and I hit a “bourbon class” last weekend, which is basically a tasting, and you get to try things that you ordinarily, probably would never try.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What I did discover is that I am no fan of corn whiskey! It doesn’t compare to the nectar of the gods that is good bourbon!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hopefully I can check out a beer tasting and more “bourbon classes” soon…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Maybe, my life will take and exciting turn and I will be back to tell my tales soon!!!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-18246073760182491042013-03-08T15:25:00.002-05:002013-03-08T15:25:47.531-05:00Impromptu Hideousness<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">How does someone who doesn’t have to be at work until 9, wind up being late for work?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Sigh…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">First, said person has to go out the night before for a couple of impromptu beers.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Then, the same person, arrives home, not too late, but cannot sleep.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">This person also fails to plug in their phone, which they use for their alarm.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Person jerks awake, checks phone, DEAD, turns on tv… it’s 902a!!! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Already 2 minutes late for work and not even out of bed yet!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Sigh…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Arrived at 934a, even stopped and picked up breakfast, I will not comment on my hideousness… you can judge for yourself!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikFAlEO_1IubYvJMV2jBIprZ5fjKEoSBJWT_XUEybNLQa8NVbiNcjlr_UjMm35rYYma3jPtsNTawa0G3w_yILc0Yv_vV9kTwCndByLTWjXR4IiyExJ8-qgQzaMhSNH6FCArub4Gwm2VRsU/s1600/hideous.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" jsa="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikFAlEO_1IubYvJMV2jBIprZ5fjKEoSBJWT_XUEybNLQa8NVbiNcjlr_UjMm35rYYma3jPtsNTawa0G3w_yILc0Yv_vV9kTwCndByLTWjXR4IiyExJ8-qgQzaMhSNH6FCArub4Gwm2VRsU/s320/hideous.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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Hideous me!</div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Last night I ventured down to Mainstrasse for a couple of beers at <a href="http://www.mainstrassevillagepub.com/" target="_blank">The Village Pub</a>.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">First of all, I have to say their beer selection is BANGIN.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you wanna try it, chances are that they’ve got it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I enjoyed 2 beers, a Dragon’s Milk, which I’ve had before and LOVE and a Founder’s Breakfast Stout, which was totally yummy…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Tonight, I’m heading to the Southgate House Revival to see The Tillers with my favorite Cuz and his awesome GF… then tomorrow morning to OTR to eat breakfast and break out the camera! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Check out my photo blog <a href="http://reflectionsuponmyreality.wordpress.com/" target="_blank">Reflections Upon My Reality</a>!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">The rest of my weekend is unplanned… sleep and washing my underpants has to fall somewhere in the span of those 48 hours…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Have a great weekend, my friends!!!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-74655325976058290622013-03-07T11:37:00.000-05:002013-03-07T11:37:10.710-05:00Giving the Universe Vertigo<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Ok, I’m in a little better humor today, I think the bottle of wine last night was just what the doctor ordered.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I’m an ok kinda girl, maybe slightly odd, a little interesting, no doubt I can be fun, I can cook, give a fantastic back rub, am self supporting,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m an awesome friend, <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m fairly intelligent… what other qualities do I need to work on???<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I am sincerely turning it all over to the universe.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’m going to try to keep putting out the good… and maybe it will come back to me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">So I get these messages on the dating site from “Marriedbutneedssomeone”.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">The first message I don’t even reply to.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I mean, seriously, come on dude.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">But he is persistent.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I finally write back:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">“I have absolutely no interest in being The Other Woman.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">He promptly replies: <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">“I am looking for the long-term woman, forever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Wife is the other woman.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">This guy obviously lives in the same alternate universe that my ex resides in.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">He kept directing me to a movie “Same Time Next Year” saying that’s what he’s looking for.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Should I direct him to watch “Vertigo”?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That’s what I want…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUCTRBXQZ_sjez53t7Iqwn0WUcniH9RfP66FOV0UZQQW6EsURxCPFLPDGxIl-Z6EAB4KtpJd3YtGBLhpeEX83IIbBb7aDnYzFw5_auKq0OM-tRkY50sUoKeIyU5hgIodHecU0DtkWO6hjW/s1600/vertigo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" jsa="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUCTRBXQZ_sjez53t7Iqwn0WUcniH9RfP66FOV0UZQQW6EsURxCPFLPDGxIl-Z6EAB4KtpJd3YtGBLhpeEX83IIbBb7aDnYzFw5_auKq0OM-tRkY50sUoKeIyU5hgIodHecU0DtkWO6hjW/s320/vertigo.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Anyway… I didn’t continue the conversation.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I’m lonely, yes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I want someone, yes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">But, no matter what kind of spin he wants to put on it, I’m still not going to be “The Other Woman”.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">So I must endeavor on…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">This weekend’s plans are still in the early stages of development.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I know that I am going to catch a show with my fav cuz and his awesome girlfriend Friday night, maybe get out and take some photos with Crawdad on Sunday… the weather is supposed to be warm; hopefully I’ll get out Saturday too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I really must do laundry some time… or I’ll have to buy some new underpants.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-39129145971466205422013-03-06T12:16:00.000-05:002013-03-06T12:16:11.969-05:00Down in the Snow<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Well, I came to a realization this morning as I drove to the office.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I’m never going to meet anyone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">It’s been 3.5 years on the dating merry-go-round and I’m still alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even statistically it becomes less likely, the older I get, the longer I’m single…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I feel really down today… maybe it’s the snow…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I dunno.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6062401235627001146.post-39535586135023087982013-03-01T13:16:00.001-05:002013-03-01T13:16:12.882-05:00Pondering the Prospective...<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Hello friends!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Maintaining two blogs is a little more time consuming than I expected.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well, now that I am healthier and actually able to do something other than lie around on my dead ass.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I will have, hopefully, two photo jaunts this weekend… it is sometimes inconvenient to be obsessive… but hopefully, this is a good obsession that will pay off, at least with some self-satisfaction.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">So dinner tonight, photos with JG tomorrow, hopefully, dinner tomorrow night and photos with CC on Sunday!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hope to get to a couple of cemeteries that I haven’t been to this weekend, and CC is supposed to map out a plan for Sunday.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I’m ridiculously psyched.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">The photo blog is <a href="http://reflectionsuponmyreality.wordpress.com/" target="_blank">here</a>.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I haven’t had a lot of action on the dating site this week, but I haven’t been on there roaming around.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If you don’t log on you get pushed to the back of the bus… less attention.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And I’m totally ok with that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes it just gets old.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I did get this sexy little message this week…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJFhjeSkUHYu77qA3N6HljGEHEEVhqXelmiVMx4zNyDzrMeOaDfcoa2rMUyi1bFHdubAY1rXZIc7fMl7kOpnmDwrMRazBE9r-PDMnm576fZN34eoQpU_rQAX_y5WZRAU9UUslIhFhHDdBs/s1600/date.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" gsa="true" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJFhjeSkUHYu77qA3N6HljGEHEEVhqXelmiVMx4zNyDzrMeOaDfcoa2rMUyi1bFHdubAY1rXZIc7fMl7kOpnmDwrMRazBE9r-PDMnm576fZN34eoQpU_rQAX_y5WZRAU9UUslIhFhHDdBs/s320/date.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">He did follow up by saying that he was just kidding.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess he could have been, and if he was, come on… that’s your best opening line?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I’d rather get one of the “HI” messages.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I think I’m just jaded to it all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Vulgar, suggestive emails, random photos of dude’s junk… none of that even fazes me anymore.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I almost long for the days of my innocence… three and a half years ago.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But, then what would I write about???<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I suppose that when/if I ever meet THE ONE, I’ll abandon this blog and go strictly with the photo blog.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Especially since I’m having trouble managing 2 obsessions now, throw a man into the mix and I’ll be totally fucked.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjD8N2ivuKM2zNkxbfA_0FMwwINSmsOuCdX8GuHjiS0psJAp9WziJzR5g6EPbhQEgQU4dr-2L9yYPwuprXiDWkfcC155nAVpDPgApavlevTvFa9N8Nk8ibFfgZp09uQHFlOHSq6vb9nEW_/s1600/ponder.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" gsa="true" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjD8N2ivuKM2zNkxbfA_0FMwwINSmsOuCdX8GuHjiS0psJAp9WziJzR5g6EPbhQEgQU4dr-2L9yYPwuprXiDWkfcC155nAVpDPgApavlevTvFa9N8Nk8ibFfgZp09uQHFlOHSq6vb9nEW_/s320/ponder.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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Pondering...</div>
TrippyBethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15497642009881035509noreply@blogger.com3