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Monday, January 14, 2013

Depression, Bluegrass and Cemeteries

I've suffered with depression for many years... An on and off kind of thing.
Sometimes I can sense its insidious creeping across my life, like the girl from The Ring slithering its way into my days and nights.

Other times, it's like I stepped off a curb without looking both ways and it hits me full on like a mother fucking TANK bus.

Did anyone see the bus that sped away?

It's something that I don't even care to talk about, generally.  It makes me feel weak, less than really.  I know, intellectually, that is a silly way to feel.  But feeling that way doesn't make my feelings valid, it just makes me ashamed of them.

I know that I'm not alone in suffering from depression, it seems like people are suffering at epidemic proportions.  Of course I never liked being like everyone else.
My depression is also a medication-resistant variety, which basically means that I just need to learn to live with it.
Puny TrippyBeth

So, I have a few bad days now and then.  This weekend has been a few of those bad days.  Yesterday and today I have also been stricken with a migraine.  Migraines and depression travel hand-in-hand.

Why can't depression and glowing skin or depression and perfect hair or depression and ample breasts go hand-in-hand??

Sigh, but it is what it is.

So.... Friday night, before I was afflicted with the depression/migraine double whammy, I went out for a family birthday dinner and then headed to the Southgate House Revival ( to see a show.
The Revival is such a cool venue...

Two shots from the Sanctuary.

I love old churches.  Not because I'm religious, I'm agnostic actually.  But because of the beautiful architecture. 
There is a small church for sale on Madison Avenue, that I'd love to have and convert into a home, if it wasn't on Madison Avenue.  Maybe some day...

We went to the Southgate to see The Tillers ( a really great local bluegrass band.  They did not disappoint.  Their sound is so clean, LOVE THEM!

Before The Tillers took the stage we were audibly raped by a band, whose genre I couldn't even begin to guess.  I could not decipher even ONE word that the singer was warbling... NOT ONE!
After a little homework, I discovered that they classified themselves as "Crust Metal". I've never heard of crust metal, I suppose I'm way outta the loop.  It doesn't matter though, you couldn't pay me to go to a crust metal show.

Also performing were Jason and the Punknecks (, in the lounge.  I was diggin on them too, sadly the sound in there wasn't too good.  I suppose it was just an issue of acoustics, but  I'd definitely see them again.
Playing in the Sanctuary before The Tillers, were The Blue Rock Boys (, an Irish traditional folk band.  They were great too!

The Pièce de résistance was The Tillers!!

When I got home Friday night, i put the camera on charge in anticipation of heading to Spring Grove Cemetery Saturday morning.

I got up Saturday morning, gathered my camera, a rain hat and hit the road.

I got to Spring Grove, it was overcast, but not raining.  There weren't a lot of people there, even though it was warm.  I got the Nikon out, put it around my neck, stuck the iPhone in my pocket and headed out.  I get to the edge of one of the ponds, there was some fog still hanging over the water, a perfect photo op.  I turn on the Nikon.  Nothing.
I go back to the car, exchange the battery.  Still NOTHING.
I was so frustrated, I couldn't figure out what was going on, I had charged the camera for several hours.
Maybe I had over-charged it?  Is that even possible?

I was mad and nearly left.

But, I still had my trusty iPhone and I've taken some pretty fantastic photos with it in the past, so off i went!
I got some pretty good shots, I'm printing a few to frame and add to my gallery wall.

Here are a couple, the first, of course is me.  You can check out more, if you like, at my Flickr page

When I got home, start looking over the camera, I discover that I was charging it WRONG.  Sheesh AND I had even charged it once before!!  I am so not techy, and obviously not a reader of operations manuals.
But now, the camera is fully charged and I 'm ready to head out and get some more awesome photos!  I'd love to get some cemetery shots in the snow, surely that should be doable soon!

Ok, I'm off now, hopefully my head will calm down enough for me to finish the book I'm reading...
To go completely off subject, I'd love to go to Mortuary School, I think I'd be good at it, good with the departed and with the families.  Sadly, as a single girl, there's no way I could do it now, financially and with work.

Oh, and I'll leave you with a photo of my new notepad, I can't wait to write a note to the Backstabber on it!!


Vigilarius said...

Depression certainly isn't something to take for granted. :(

(Those photos from Spring Grove are great, by the way.)

TrippyBeth said...

I suppose that one would say it is my cross to bear Vigilarius..

And thanks, I can't wait to get back out there with my REAL camera, barring any technical difficulties!!!

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