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Thursday, September 13, 2012

The No Over Sharing Zone.. RIGHT HERE!

Over sharing.

Ordinarily, I don’t think that I am guilty of this.  Of course, now that I am blogging, I guess it could be said that I am.  But it is for entertainment, so I think that I get a pass on it.

Today, I am in the public restroom at work, minding my own business.  C, the backstabber, from my office is in there, loudly informing the entire bathroom public of how many times she has shit in the last two days.

Excuse me???  I didn’t hear ANYONE ask.  I, for one, do not give a flying fuck.  But she continues describing the speed with which food hustles itself through her gut.

“TMI, C!” I yell from my stall.  I truly wanted to yell “SHUT THE FUCK UP” but I refrained. 

She giggles… really?

People often over share with me once they find out that I’m a nurse.  I once sat at a bar with a very handsome man who told me all about his hemorrhoids once he found out my vocation.

That’s not sexy.  I could never look at him the same way again.

I think that they expect more compassion than I’m likely to give.  It’s not that I don’t care….. wait….. yea, I don’t care.  I’m not a mean person, really, and I can have empathy and sympathy.  Unless you’re stupid.  And honestly, I’ve seen people sicker than you that didn’t die.  So suck it up.

It is NEVER ok to talk about your BMs to anyone in the general public; this includes your coworkers, and SPECIFICALLY ME.

A friend of mine used to commute with a woman who described in sickening detail her…uuummmm….female problems.  What kind of social retard are you to think that is appropriate?  Have they no shame? If I had issues like that I would not be broadcasting it to anyone, I’d be making a beeline to my OBGYN, some things you do not fuck around with!

Some people have dumb kids.

People over share about things other than their bodily functions, of course.  Several months ago I went on a date with a guy, who seemed very nice and interesting (well prior to our meeting).
We met at a favorite place of mine in Mainstrasse.
Before I arrived I told him what I’d be wearing, a skirt, I think, and heels.  He said he was wearing a “Big Bang Theory” t-shirt.  I laughed; I honestly thought he was joking.

I arrive at the restaurant, he is standing out front…. Wearing the “Big Bang Theory” t-shirt.  I was seriously overdressed.  Sigh.

But, TrippyBeth does not surrender that easily, I usher him into the restaurant.  We sit down and order beers.  I order a Guinness (mmmmm) he orders a Coors light.  This date is going nowhere fast.

He had obviously not been out in the dating scene too long, so for that I cut him some slack (see, I’m not mean). 

Then… he starts telling me about his children.

There were issues of truancy, drugs, robbery… all sorts of awful things that I wouldn’t want to be exposed to.  I really think he just needed to talk, once he started, there was no stopping him.  I just sat there sipping my Guinness as the levee broke.

I tried to interject a time or two, with some advice or to change the subject, but he was in the zone, I let him carry on.

He finally took a break long enough to go to the restroom.  I asked the waitress for separate checks while he was gone.

He was not the guy for me and I’m sure he wasn’t ready to start any new relationships.  I do hope he gets those kids straightened out though, sheesh.

He did me a favor though, glad I found out his issues on the first meet.  I am generally not an interrogator.  I kinda like to just mosey along and find out things as I go.  My mother was an interrogator, and I hated it, so I guess I’ve vowed to be the opposite.  Sometimes it probably would pay to ask questions, like “are you married?”

I may take a road trip tonight; it is an absolutely beautiful day in the Ohtucky!!!

Oh, I am working on overcoming my fatalistic attitude, I know it won’t be easy.  Today I am trying a mantra “I am charming and beautiful”.


Hopefully I can convince my brain, it just thinks it’s so smart! UG

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