Monday's Pain...

Happy Monday my friends!  It’s a 3 day week! Can I get a WOOT WOOT?!?!?!

This Monday starts with a weird flare of my dermatomyositis; I’m having some joint issues.  Apparently some folks with dermo do get joint problems.  Fucking awesome.  But, at least I don’t have any lung problems, so it could definitely be much worse.

Anyway…

I had a pretty decent weekend, despite the difficulty I had walking yesterday due to the dermo’s attack on the hardware in my ankle.

Saturday I spent the afternoon with my mother.  Which is quite odd, we aren’t particularly close.  But it was a nice day.

We started out lunch at The York Street Café.  Mother had never been there and she enjoyed it.

I, of course, ordered the dirty hummus, which did not disappoint.

Dirty Hummus

Mother had never had good hummus before and she enjoyed it as well.  For my entrée I chose the Voodoo Tilapia which was also quite tasty.

Voodoo Tilapia

After lunch, we moseyed next door to a little antique shop.  Where I found Mac Boozer!!

Mac

He is perched atop a working music box and his cap comes off to be used as a liquor decanter!  He is wearing a kilt AND he can hold his alcohol, he could be the perfect man!!  So I’ve planted him on the mantle, near Angus, my other kilted pal.

After lunch, we headed across the river to see the Trans-Siberian Orchestra.

It was an interesting show, a little too Christmas-y for my taste (I am not a fan of Christmas, not even a little bit) but I really enjoyed the light show.  The second half of the show wasn’t really Christmas, so it was cool.  That’s a hardworking group of people.  The concert lasted almost 3 hours and they worked it!!

Nearly the entire cast, band had really long hair, which they were swinging around A LOT.  Of course, in rock-n-roll there is a lot of head swinging, I know this.  Even their back up singers/dancers had long hair and swinging it was the majority of their dance moves.

I wondered if they would have been nearly as good with short hair… maybe their power was held within their flowing locks.  Sort of like Samson… it was something to ponder, while I tried to ignore the depressing part of the show when they were telling the story of a business man and his brain damaged child (I could have lived forever without hearing that story, even though it had a happy ending).

Overall, I did enjoy my Saturday.

Yesterday was uninteresting, with shopping, cleaning and laundry.  Yea, I know, I’m a wild woman.

As I was reading over the messages from the dating site this morning, I wondered, why do men that live in excess of 90 minutes away message me?  It seems that the bulk of the messages I’ve gotten lately are from men that live in far away cities that I’ve never even heard of. 

I don’t get it.

Anything, really, over an hour can really, seriously hinder dating.   And 2+ hours? That’s just silly.  Is the pool of women that are local to them really that shallow?  Are they related to all of them? Have they already dated everyone in their zip code?

I know I’m awesome, but I’m not 2+ hours of driving awesome, I’d only drive that far for Jack White.  And I HATE driving, I’m a marginally bad driver, 2+ hours of driving would be torturous for me.  I’d arrive tired and very grumpy.  Who wants that?  Trust me; no one likes Grumpy TrippyBeth, not even me!

I am still waiting for my editor friend to read my short story.  I know that it still needs work, but I’ve vowed to myself not to look at it again until after he’s sent it back to me with edits.  The waiting is KILLING me!!

I should really start something else, but I’m not sure I can while the other story is still floating around in my head.  So, I’ll wait a few more days…

Ok, I’m off to do my paying job… have a good Monday my friends!!!

SIck Shopping...

I am so tired today.  Actually, I have been for a few days now.  I’m not exactly sure what’s up with me.  The best way I can describe it, is that I feel like the blood has been drained out of me.

Is it the methotrexate? The prednisone? The dermatomyositis? Am I just lazy? Am I depressed?

It could be the medications, it could be the dermatomyositis.

I am lazy sometimes, but not generally for a stretch of this many days.

I don’t think I’m depressed.  I remember thinking I was depressed after the split with my ex.  I went to a therapist who said “You’re not depressed, you just lived with an asshole for too many years.”  He really nailed it. 

I am still amazed at how my life has changed over the last three years.  It’s definitely been a journey.  The journey, however, has taken a detour over the course of the last 18 months or so with the dermatomyositis.  I get a little angry sometimes, I so don’t want to be the sick girl.  I wanna be Action Girl again…..

I have learned that it is important to listen to my body.  If I’m tired, I have to rest, or I’ll get sick.  And I can’t afford to be sicker than I already am.  I’m hopeful that one more night of lying low will have me back on my game.

Since I’ve been puny and lying around, I realized that I still had a little bonus money burning hole in my bank account.  So I climb out there on the interwebs…. Two things I have been looking for, a bottlecap man and a retro-looking dress. 

Found them both!!

Can't wait to get this little guy... any name suggestions?

THE dress.

I paid a little more than I had planned for my little man, but they are fairly rare, so I think he was worth it. 

The dress I got on sale!!  But I had to buy a pair of shoes to go with, so I really haven’t saved any money.  I seldom ever buy anything new, so this is a real treat for myself!

And DAMMIT, I deserve it!!

Hopefully charming and amusing TrippyBeth will return tomorrow!!!

Voluntary Poisoning.....

One day closer to the weekend!! WOOT WOOT!!!

I think I’m gonna make it!

Once a week, I put poison into my body.

I know you’re thinking “She drinks more than once a week”.

This particular poison is prescribed to me by my physician.  It’s a chemotherapy agent, albeit a mild one.  Methotrexate.

I take it in one dose, once a week.  6 tablets.

Some weeks, on the day after, I feel shiteous.  Other days after I feel fine.  It has been completely unpredictable.

Yesterday was my day after.  I didn’t feel sick really, just super tired.  Of course my condition can cause fatigue as well, but I can usually push through it.

I have an autoimmune condition called Dermatomyositis.  http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001842/  It is listed as a “rare disease” by the Office of Rare Diseases.

So, after work yesterday, I went to Kroger, got some veggies, came home and roasted them, then napped.   I woke up from the nap, put on my pajamas and went back to bed.  That was the most sleep I’ve gotten in so long I can’t even remember.  Sometimes I forget to listen to my body, I didn’t forget yesterday!

I was hesitant to begin the methotrexate therapy.  I was already taking a rather large dose of prednisone.  More medication just didn’t seem like a good idea to me.  I held off as long as I could.  But I just wasn’t getting better.

In May of this year, I relented.  I started poisoning myself every Monday night (which is now Monday or Tuesday, depending on the functioning of my brain) the first part of May.  I was hoping to see some improvement before I went on vacation at the end of the month.

Doesn’t that sound poetic? “I poison myself every Monday”…..

I have to admit, now, 3 months later, I can tell that it is working.  So well, in fact, that I am attempting to wean myself off of the prednisone.  I am seeing enough improvement that I am hopeful that, soon, I can go back to being Action Girl (a nickname given to my by a friend).  I miss Action Girl, she kicks ass.  But only in a good way, she’s a lover not a fighter!

Keep your fingers crossed for me my friends!!!

Tonight will be a sad evening….. one of my best friends, JG, lost his father on Sunday and the services are tonight.

JG’s papa fought a long battle, as did his entire family.  My heart is breaking for him, I love him like a little brother, he is such a good man. 

Please send some good vibes JG’s way………….

I'll have the doc with the full sleeve, please....

Today I had a doctor’s appointment, such a joy….  I will continue on my current medication regime, only increasing the folic acid, in hopes that my hair will stop falling out.  I surrendered 3 vials of blood and was off on my way…..

The hair falling out thing is pretty distressing, but it is par for the course with the medication that I take.  It needs to stop asap…. I will not be able to maintain my incorrigible cuteness as a bald chica….. so we shall see.

As I sat there waiting (which was not long, as I was the first patient of the day, the best appointment to have if you actually have a life to get back to when you leave the office) I thought back to my first visit with this particular doctor, a rheumatologist, I’ll call Dr.B.

At the first visit, my diagnosis was still unconfirmed, but we were between lupus, dermatomyositis and the unknown.  He did the obligatory physical, reviewed notes from my dermatologist and previous lab results.  After the studying and his quizzing of me, he began to outline the game plan.

Medications were discussed and further testing.

“Since you have several tattoos, even though they look well done, we should really test you for hepatitis.”  Dr.B said without looking up from my chart.

I just nodded my head.  But in my mind, I’m thinking “I don’t have any hepatitis symptoms.”  But I guess that’s prudent in his way of thinking…. Rule everything out.

I, of course, don’t have hepatitis.  I only go to reputable shops that maintain sterile equipment and clean tattooing.

Which leads me to think about tattoos and healthcare.

I remember being in nursing school, I was rounding in OB and had a nurse that I was working under tell me this, when taking care of a patient with a few small tattoos “That girl has tattoos, make sure you double glove.”   Funny how those little statements stick with you, even all these years later.

My former mother-in-law, a nurse, (I will refrain from calling her a psycho fucking bitch) made the statement more than once “If they have more than one tattoo, they are not worth saving”  how I wish that nut job could see me now….. I don’t want you to save me you piece of shit….. what happened to people just being people? And we are all worth saving?  Would you really want a nurse caring for you that had that attitude, even if you had NO tattoos?? I wouldn’t.  Skill in your medical professional is extremely important (which really should go without saying) but skill without compassion, without seeing every patient as first a human being, is less than ideal.

We know that the prejudice exists against tattooed patients, how about tattooed medical professionals?

So, utilizing my extensive research methodology…. I Googled “Tattooed doctors”.

This image always comes up in such searches

http://www.inkedmag.com/inked-people/dr-dave/

Dr.Dave, I’d love to work for you, dude.  This guy is fucking awesome.

Full sleeves on my doc? Yes, if you please.  I dig it.

Now…… when perusing the list of items that came up in the search I came across many other results that weren’t so pleasant to me.

For example, this was on a thread on the College Confidential board entitled “Doctors with Tattoos”.  The person that started the thread was asking a thoughtful question about whether or not they should get a wrist tattoo, with a poem, when they were on track to become a surgeon/researcher.  A valid question for someone in school who has yet to be tattooed, it’s not a decision someone should jump into without giving it some thought.

Some of the replies were well thought out, considerate…… but others….. well I’ll let you judge for yourself….

“I would never go to a doctor with a tattoo.”

“I wouldn't go to a doctor who has a tattoo. If I had a doctor and then found that s/he had a tattoo, I'd change doctors. To me, tattoos are evidence of a simple absence of judgment. They have no real benefit and serve to alienate a large portion of the population. If a prospective doctor has no better judgment than that, they're not qualified to have me for a patient.”

“I am a doc, and I would hold a visible tattoo against someone in interviewing for med school admissions and for employment in my practice. Harsh but true. I think it shows a lack of judgment, and one can discriminate against those with tattoos - it is not a protected minority. Do Henna for the wrist, and think long and hard about permanent ink.”  Notice how this person points out, indignantly, that one can discriminate against those with tattoos, it is not a protected minority. Classy.

In the end, the medical student that posted the query decided NOT to get the tattoo.  While I fully support a person’s right to be, or not to be tattooed, I feel that he/she made the decision based on obtuse opinions, like those shown above.

But what are you gonna do?

Would patients really be offended by my tattooed wrists?  My simple black Celtic knots?  To me they are beautiful, empowering (i do hate that word) even.  If I came into your hospital room, to give you care, give you comfort, in a skilled and compassionate manner, would you decline, simply because of the black ink on my wrist?

Look at these tattoo statistics:

Statistic Verification

Source: Pew Research Center, Tattoo Finder, Vanishing Tattoo

Date Verified: 3.23.2012

Statistic Verification

Source: Pew Research Center, Tattoo Finder, Vanishing Tattoo

Date Verified: 3.23.2012

Tattoo Statistics
Annual amount of U.S. spending on tattoos	$1.65 Billion
Total percent of Americans (all ages) who have at least one tattoo	14 %
Percentage of U.S. adults 18 – 25 who have at least one tattoo	36 %
Percentage of U.S. adults 26 – 40 who have at least one tattoo	40 %
Total number of Americans that have at least one tattoo	45 million
Number of tattoo parlors in the U.S.	21,000
Average cost of a small tattoo	$ 45
Average cost of a large tattoo	$150 / hour
Percentage of U.S. population who have covered up a tattoo with another tattoo	5 %
Percentage of people with tattoos who claim they are addicted to ink	32 %
Percentage of people who have some regret after getting their tattoo	17 %
Percentage of people with a tattoo who are getting or have had one removed	11 %
Factors Considered When Getting A Tattoo
Percentage of people with tattoos who think the reputation of tattoo artist or tattoo studio is the most important factor	49 %
Percentage of people with tattoos who think price is the most important factor	8 %
Percentage of people with tattoos who think a tattoo with a personal meaning is the most important factor	43 %
How People Feel About Their Tattoo
Total percentage of people with tattoos who say their tattoo makes them feel rebellious	29 %
Percentage of people with a tattoo that say it makes them feel more sexy	31 %
Percentage of people with tattoos who say their tattoo makes them feel more intelligent	5 %

Statistic Verification

Source: Pew Research Center, Tattoo Finder, Vanishing Tattoo

Date Verified: 3.23.2012

With 45 million Americans having at least one tattoo, chances are, that at some point in your life, you will have a healthcare provider that is tattooed.  And if you have a problem with that, first let me say that you are kind of a dick, suck it up.  It's a reality.

Tattooed people are no different than non-tattooed people except that they don't care if you're tattooed or not (I totally stole that from Anonymous).

Swallow Tattoos

I love the look of traditional tattoos and the symbolism behind them.  One of my favorites is the swallow tattoo.

Swallows have been imprinted in the skin of man for hundreds of years.  They were a favorite of sailors.

Legend says that when sailors had traveled 5000 miles they would obtain a swallow tattoo, which was a sign of status among the sailing population.  It also served as a resume of sorts, when a captain saw that the sailor possessed a swallow tattoo, he knew that the sailor in question was experienced and had weathered many storms, so to speak (literally and figuratively).

And if a sailor had 2 swallow tattoos, CHA CHING! I bet he got hired right on the spot!

Another legend says that if a sailor drowns, the swallow will carry his soul off to heaven.  Sinking ships and drowning sailors were not uncommon, and I think it was prudent to have the swallow on your skin, ready to perform its duty in the case of a tragedy.

Sailors were some pretty smart and superstitious dudes.

Swallows also have symbolism outside of the sailing community.  They can symbolize honor, faith, love, luck, loyalty, family, friendship, monogamy (swallows mate for life)……. All very noble sentiments.

But the one that had the most significance to me is that adventurers/travelers would always find their way home.

I’ve been searching for someplace that feels like home for years…. I’m hoping my fat little swallow will lead me there that would be the ultimate lucky break for me.

Most people that know me well are quite shocked that I have a tattoo of a bird.  I have a bird phobia.  I have even been good-naturedly teased about it.  But in my way of thinking, maybe having a bird on my skin it will help desensitize me….. We shall see how that works out. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ornithophobia)

Most swallow tattoos are based upon the blue barn swallow:

And the most common style of swallows done now is in the Sailor Jerry style, which is classic Americana…  (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sailor_Jerry)

So……. After I poured over hundreds of swallow images (drawings, photos and actual tattoos) I found one that was similar to what I was after.  A round, feminine little swallow.

I took the drawing to the awesome Dustin Zion at Asylum Tattoo in Latonia KY www.asylumtattoo.com, www.facebook.com/dustin.zion .

Dustin tweaked the image a little, made a stencil and we set about tattoo process……..

The stencil.

Dustin hard at work.

The finished product.

I am mad about my chubby little swallow, Dustin did a fantastic job. 

I have an autoimmune disorder, Dermatomyositis (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dermatomyositis), it in combination with the medications that I take, causes me to heal weirdly at times.  So I had to have my swallow touched up a little over a week ago, which is a necessary evil in maintaining tattoos, even for normal people.  But I try to take good care of my skin art, lotion, sunscreen.... I want them to be beautiful forever....... even when I'm an old lady......