Pass The Cheese, I Already Have the Whine

Now for a mish-mash of blogging…

First I’ll give you Exhibitionist Guy.

Is rubbing off on cam really a big thing?  Sheesh, I get asked if I wanna “watch” with moderate regularity.  And I do NOT have anything in my profile saying that’s my THING.  I’m pretty visual, I think, for a girl.  Usually women aren’t excessively turned on by watching.  That’s why porn is such a man’s game.  I especially wouldn’t get turned on knowing that all I could do was watch.  Kinda takes the fun out of it, in my opinion.

I mean, if you’re in a long distance relationship, I totally get the camming.  But a total stranger?  AND you know that his arousal has NOTHING to do with YOU, just his thing for having someone watch him.

Again, isn’t Tumblr for that?  Some folks wanna watch, so match the watchers up with the strokers and it’s a match made in heaven… well heaven might not be the best term.

But, go on with your bad selves!! Just don’t involve me, K?

I will say that I may have a tiny exhibitionist streak of my own, but not to show off to total strangers.  Someone accused me of liking to show off my boobs this weekend! I was shocked at the accusation! I denied it!

"Do you like your boobs?" I was asked.

"Well of course I do" I answered.

That doesn't make me addicted to showing them off, although I may concur that a photo with a little cleavage is not a bad thing!

I must really be racking up the REM sleep lately, I’ve been dreaming like CRAZY.

Over the weekend I had a few interesting dreams.

The first:

I dreamt I married someone I went to elementary school for 2 years with.  I haven’t seen him in FOREVER, although we do chat some on Facebook.

In the dream, we married, went to bed (no brown-chicken-brown-cow) and when we woke up the next morning he asked “Are we ever going to make out?” 

This particular guy had told me, recently, that when I came to their school (4^th & 5^th grade) that the boys all had crushes on me.

I was flabbergasted!! I just felt like the new weird girl.  If I had known, WOW what it would have done for my self esteem!  May have changed the whole course of my life!

The second:

I dreamt I was married to a way older man and we lived in this huge house.  My bedroom was on the third floor, in an attic-like room.  In one window there was a window air conditioner.  I walked past it and it FELL OUT!  BLAM, down on the driveway.

So, older husband comes home, I tell him about it, and he’s FURIOUS.  I tell him that obviously he didn’t install it right or it wouldn’t have fallen out so easily.

Weird.

The common theme here is that I’m married.  In the second dream, I just felt married. Maybe because there was some obvious misery going on?

Now, I’m  not TOTALLY against marriage, I’m not.  It works out great for some people, I know that.  I just feel that I can be just as committed to someone, without a marriage license as I could be with one.  I’d have no problem living in sin…  we all know TrippyBeth digs a little sinnin’!

It can’t be all that bad, people keep doing it… even the gay folks want to do it (which I totally support BTW), if it’s a right for some of us, it should be a right for all of us!  Doesn’t government have bigger fish to fry anyway?

Of course, it’s not as though that situation is anywhere on my horizon!

The last time I was proposed to it was via Facebook from someone I’ve never even met! Sigh… I don’t think that could be considered a REAL proposal.  And the time before that, the guy that suggested we fly out to Vegas and get married, ended up ALREADY BEING MARRIED.  For fuck’s sake.  I asked him what he had planned to do once we got to Vegas.  He said that he had planned to explain everything on the plane (where I’d be a captive audience).  And of course, because he was so awesome, I’d totally be ok with being the other woman, something I swore I’d NEVER be…

Uuuuuummmmm, yea… NO FUCKING WAY!

Some people really do have dumb kids.

At this time, the whiney portion of the blog will commence, so you may leave if you have no patience for it.

Yesterday I was beshittified, AGAIN.  I just can’t seem to kick whatever this is.  So I was down for the day with fever and just general crapification.  I feel like a broken record, same story different day.

So I had a doctor’s appointment this morning. 

Told him of the fevers and the joint pains.

He thinks that it could be that my immune system is still whacked out from when I had the flu, and it’s so confused that it’s attacking my joints.  Big surprise that something in me would be confused, amiright?   It’s a wonder I can even make it to work every day, my brain is so overloaded with ideas, phobias, questions, platypuses (?)….

Anyway… he said to give it a MONTH!

It could seriously take that long.  If it isn’t better by then, we will assume that the joint tomfoolery is from the Dermatomyositis and not my fucked up immune system. Yay!  At that point we will increase the Methotrexate again… I was hoping to avoid that, but this joint stuff performs major donkey fellatio.

So I’m supposed to get plenty of rest, eat well and ride this out for a little while longer… I so want a magic wand waved over me… anybody got one???

Before I left the office, I peacefully surrendered 4 vials of blood and they sent me back out into the cold…

I did get complimented on my shoes, they ARE super cute!!

I’ve left this week virtually unplanned, I’m gonna chill out, try to eat right and hopefully write…

That is the plan anyway, we will see how it works out!