Friday, August 24, 2012

Boring on a Friday...

Today, TrippyBeth is not so entertaining.  I’m honestly in a foul mood and I have no idea why.   Nothing particularly bad going on in my life.  Physically, I’m feeling a little better; I slept a gazillion hours last night, so I should feel better.

My work is fairly boring, as I’ve stated earlier when telling you about my love for rectal foreign bodies… again, not in my rectum.  Sometimes, something happens that is slightly out of the ordinary.

For example, on Monday… we have a small private bathroom in our suite.  I seldom use it because the only male in our office, at times, has difficulty navigating the trajectory required to deposit his urine in the bowl of the toilet.  GROSS.  If I get pee on the hem of my pants, like another girl here in the office did, I’m going to be fucking pissed.

Anyway, one of the other ladies in the office used this lavatory and when she flushed it, it proceeded to run water into the tank yet not fill up.  So, being ever-industrious, she takes the lid off of the tank, discovers the chain has come unhooked from the thingy. She reaches in to replace the chain, and dislodges the hose that fills the tank.
At this time, I am walking past the restroom to see a geyser spewing out into the office.  The lady, who had triggered this natural disaster, was standing there saying “I GOT WATER IN MY EYES!”

Jeebus.

I go in the bathroom and shut off the water to the toilet.

That event kept the ladies entertained all day.

Today, the backstabber asked the person that orders supplies if she could order her an “L” for her keyboard, as the “L” was rubbed off of her key.

For fuck’s sake.

“You don’t know where the L is?”  It’s in the same place it always has been, it doesn’t randomly move around the keyboard.  And if you don’t know that, it is the only key that is blank.
Now, it’s not like a blank Scrabble tile, so don’t try that…

Some people have dumb kids.

Today I am pondering the idea of disabling my profile on the dating site.  I need a break from it, and maybe good things are happening.  I think back over the last 3 years, being on and off of it.  It’s been entertaining, creepy, frightening.  One of my girlfriends said “I couldn’t do what you do, going on all those dates with strangers.”
Funny, I never looked at it like that really.  To me, it’s been a great adventure.  And as far as my dates being strangers, there have been very few that I felt unsafe to be with.  Sometimes danger is much closer to you than a stranger, this I know from experience.
So, as I ponder bowing out of the game, I think back to the very beginning of this odyssey…

I was a wild-eyed, newly single girl ready to start life over, make better choices and have fun.

I joined the online dating community after a friend had met a nice girl on a dating site, so I thought “What the Hell!”

So I created what I thought was a fantastic profile and began perusing my matches.  They were all across the board as far as different types of men… tall, short, young, old, handsome, not-so-handsome, normal, weird etc, etc…
As I was reading the profiles, I see that I have a message!!

WOOT WOOT!!

Someone saw my awesome profile and wants to know me!  Someone with GREAT taste!!

So, I excitedly go to my inbox.  Open the email…. 

And it was from…

Wait for it…

A friend of my father’s!!!

Holy fucking shit.

I needed a shower.  I was sooooo creeped out.  And, the thing was, it wasn’t like he didn’t know who I was, he addressed me by my name, said it had been a while and that he’d love to buy me dinner.

This man I had known since I was a child!  He had seen me grow up.  Scheezey…

I nearly deleted my profile on the spot, thinking this just may not be the route for me.

But, I didn’t, obviously.  I deleted the email and tried in vain to act like it had never happened. 

I haven’t been able to forget.  I probably never will… some things are forever burned in your brain.

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